In early October my girl Marie (a photog I met and grew close with through Facebook about 5 years ago) and I met up “half way” (not really. Due to Covid we had to alter our original plans so we could spend time together while also being in a none-quarantining state when we got home) so yah, we decided to meet up in Lancaster PA. It was a place I’ve been wanting to visit for years, like no joke, easily 8-9 years and I’m so glad we did. It was so beautiful, peaceful, fun, educational without being in your face, and so much more. Our kids had met one other time, about 2 springs ago on a trip to South Carolina and hit it off . So we knew this would just continue to build and grow their friendship.
So how does this “roadschooling thing” work you might ask... it doesn’t need to look like mine - where we camp and stay in a tent, camper or van... it can mean so many things for different people... yes, for some it can be full time travel as a family (my life dream) but for many it is just a weekly day trip or even an weekend trip or a vacation of sorts where you through in some educational experiences. I will be honest, up until 2 years ago when we took a vacation, it was all about sitting at the pool maybe a theme park is involved, going for dinner, etc... I never really thought more on it. 1st off, my kids were still on the young side so I was in the thick of it with tantrums, naps, strollers, 8000 snacks, maybe some diapers, etc...I also relied on heavily on the idea that ”my kids will learn what they need to learn through school” mentality. Boy, was I naive. I actually DID feel that my younger daughter learned MORE about the world and things of importance when she was in her preschool and in a way that she still remembers then my older one ever learned in hers or in her public school years (which were not that many...). I remember a lightbulb really went off for me when one of the girls grandmas took us to this AMAZING animal sanctuary in Florida. Their attention was held the ENTIRE 2+ hours we were there. I realized, well shit, they are old enough to start appreciating these things! From there- I just made it happen. Now, most times when we travel or “adventure” as we like to say, I plan out at least 1 day of activities that are learning based. Be it a museum, a junior ranger club activity, a walking tour, a live show, an activity of some other fashion, or staying somewhere that we are immersed in a culture we know nothing about.... like we did in Lancaster.
‘Lancaster is the largest Amish community in the country — there are a few other pockets throughout the US, but this one is the largest. It was SO amazing to see how this community of people are both deeply rooted in their faith and community but at the same time, have assimilated and benefitted from the “English” neighbors it lives in harmony with. It’s obviously hard to know if 25+ years ago things were as symbiotic between these 2 cultures or if over time things have become more intertwined... but regardless spending a day doing their bus tour (with double masks on and only 1 other family on the bus!) and walking through Amish owned stores, farms, and more really allowed our kids to learn throughly about something they otherwise might never have at all in school. Through this trip, I would say that all 4 kids learned not just on Amish day... but just by being with other people that do things different then they do. Marie’s son LOVES to chop wood and build fire pits — my girls, learned how to use a hatchet and help kindle a fire. They also continued to learn about how everyone is different and people all have different things to overcome. Her son for example as adhd (something she is open about and really educated others through her experience - so I feel ok sharing too) it was so special to see how my girls accepted, embraced, and understood that he needed some moments.. he had to take medicine, or his medicine wore off, that his brain has a hard time slowing down, etc... they continue to show me that they are excepting to all walks of life, regardless of the color of your skin, sexuality, religion, or disability you may be living with...
after spending a day relaxing and learning through play we took a trip to philly - where we had a walking tour planned out and a junior ranger badge to earn! I’m not sure the tour guide loved me for having them do this on the Tour haha - but since it was a private tour we made it happen. It was amazing for me to see how the things we’ve been doing and learning at home just through conversation, audio books, and a few YouTube videos helped to continue to connect the dots when we visited Philly. The tour guide showed us many historical buildings where the founding documents were created, or discussed... these are all things we’ve talked about at length at home. How did this all happen at home... to be honest, by watching the musical, Hamilton during lockdown! We started to watch it..had NO FREAKIN CLUE what was going on... and to be honest, while I loved the music - I didn’t understand what was happening when they sang about it. So I did what I normally do, I googled. I then paused the show when something new would begin and read aloud what was happening so we all understood the context. From there, their interest just took off. From conversations about the banking system, to constitution, to inequality to slavery, to our current election, and political parties, and early presidents, Boston tea party, taxation, to the civil war, to BLM to women’s rights movement... it just kinda went crazy and might seem jumbled but it isn’t, everything is intertwined really... so yah. Philly hit home for us, it was a place we connected more dots all the way down to the cobblestone streets... it was amazing. So yah, in short - is roadschooling something everyone can do...? 100% do you need to put in a little effort, for me, yes. I want to make sure we get something out of the time spent. Does every moment look this way, absolutely not! Some days are just meant for sitting at the pool or at a theme park... but others, they are meant for seeing more and digging in deeper.

Having my kids home since March, and shortly there after becoming their main educator has allowed me to guide and witness the advancements in their learning more fully. We have always encouraged reading, however, I won’t lie... we did not really have much opportunity outside the allotted 20mins of reading time to really focus on it. Before we pulled our girls from school I read to them at night and they each did their required reading... otherwise, we were just too darn busy to do more. How sad really. I know many kids love to read and do it on their own — but our kids, not so much. However, that is changing! We bring books in the car, have quiet afternoons reading and I think I have taken out more books from our local library then ever before! While I was always pretty against video games for this age group, my girls play with their dad a few times a week and omg it actually has improved their reading by leaps and bounds! They read all the Zelda text bubbles (along with doing math and other skills I never really considered before until now) my younger daughter now reads pages almost completely independently from books such as little house in the big woods, or who was books... my big love has had some “quirks” with the reading, but spending so much dedicated time with her we’ve come to find that some of the issues are vision related... so glasses have been a big problem solver. At school the books she was reading were not nearly as advanced and the text was always quite large So she skated by not really knowing something was wrong, and often her teachers either didn’t hear her read regularly OR dismissed her issues as age related...but, being at home she has wanted to read books that are more up to her abilities and with that came the struggle to see the words right...not anymore! Now she picks up many more books with confidence ❤️. We are still finding our way in many aspects but becoming a homeschool family has already paid off. My kids are so smart, so willing, so excited and it makes my heart so happy.

Soooo, typically I’m finding over the course of my almost 2 years of researching homeschool communities, curriculum, etc... that well, reformed/conservative Jewish families don’t ‘Typically” homeschool. This is not to say that Jewish families DON’T homeschool, cause well, the world is a melting pot and many families do many things they didn’t once do before... however, being Jewish myself and having a reformed Jewish upbringing with a “typical Jewish mom” I can confidently say Jewish families of my demographic strongly value traditional, hardworking, study study study school environments (well, at least mine did). This “hippie dippy Homeschool thing” is crazy as I’m sure my mom and Jewish family and friends think... that’s ok with me. I often walk to the beat of my own drum and happily instill that value into my girls as well... we are also the crazy family at our temple who owner a travel trailer, camp whenever possible, and opt for walking to the bathrooms in our shower shoes rather then a trip to the four seasons (don’t worry.. we enjoy those experiences too 😂🤪 just not in the budget so often) However, I’m seeing more often then ever before (thanks Covid) that Jewish families are coming out of the woodwork and considering a homeschool experience for their kids... maybe it’s not a forever choice, or maybe their waking up and seeing that traditional school is not the 1 size fits all solution... and there are other ways. Either way, a not-overly-religious jewish curriculum would be welcomed.. if it existed.

In a Facebook group I’m in I posted a question to the creator of the curriculum books if she’d be interested in a Jewish themed book- to which was an overwhelming response of “I’D LOVE ONE TOO!” Even from many non- Jewish parents... but open minded ones or even Christian families who value the biblical aspect of Jewish history and how it weaves into their own religious roots. Through this post someone shared the link I have here- https://ani-ve-ami.com/jewish-homeschooling/curriculum-by-age-or-grade/ages-six-to-ten-elementary-curriculum/. It is a Charlotte mason based curriculum but with Jewish studies. Being that we are reform and it was a bit too religious for us, meaning it includes Torah reading and Talmudic studies but it did give me some good ideas they do have a “Jewish daily life” section of their curriculum. However, it reminded me in terms of learning about Jewish history, culture, bible stories, prayers I’ve already done and continue to do much of this - I bought an awesome kids Jewish bible, along with a small prayers book both off amazon. We have the “who was Anne frank” book, we’ve watched “the number on great grandpas arm” from hbo - which opened doors to talk about culture and the holocaust, etc... but in general just surrounding our kids with other Jewish families whenever possible is important. Until Covid my girls went to Hebrew school — we are taking this year off since we don’t want them in any schooling environment at this time 😢 so yah, I’ll figure something out for them though... most likely it will involve a calendar for the dates, a book for the holidays, and embracing our “Jewish-ness” even more then before so that my girls continue to grow and learn as young Jewish kids.

So, back to the idea of a Jewish curriculum... sadly, it isn’t there yet.. we are going the unschooling/interest-lead route. It’s not 100% unschooling because we have a tutor who’s working with them 2x a week - for some reasons I can write about at another time. Thankfully though, there are many secular alternatives out there - just gotta do a lot of digging to find the path that works for you and your kids... and, if you are Jewish (but not super religious) homeschooling mom like myself, reach out. We can figure this path out together.. share ideas, books, etc... where there is a will, there is a way ❤️.

I won’t lie. I’m a bit bummed. I think most of us are quite bummed...bummed at the state the world, and specifically where our country is at  right now. I know the majority of parents out there are bummed their children won’t be going back to traditional schooling and are freaking out over suddenly being thrown into this homeschooling idea, when it never even crossed their mind till about 4mns ago. I on the other hand, I have been dreaming of homeschooling my girls since Big Love began kindergarten, spent a few years deep diving into what this would look like for us, a year convincing my husband of my “crazy plan”, got my mom to accept it, told friends we are doing this, I researched museum days, homeschool farming groups, learned about local nature study days, local homeschool co-op/class options, joined Facebook groups and read posts till my eyes went cross eyed... only to have these loose plans come crashing to a halt. I just read this fabulously inspiring book called, “homeschooling gone wild” by Karla Marie Williams. She does an unschooling/interest-led learning with her 6 kids. She speaks through out the book about encouraging and seeking out ways to continue to dive deeper into the interests of your children... and here I am, wishing, wanting, begging my soul to do these things for them... but just can’t. I just can not expose my most precious people on earth to this virus. I find myself digging in my heels, unlike where I would normally be putting a big pair of wings on my children and watching them soar. I want to let them join their cheer teams, take the dance classes, go back to sewing school, take a knitting class, learn to woodwork, join the farm school, do all the things. But I just can’t. I won’t right now... so instead, I’m attempting to figure out how to combine what they are hinting at wanting with our countries own virus crisis. I’m not an expert at knitting, I don’t know how to woodwork, my kids won’t do zoom classes (I learned that through lockdown) - what do we do... yes, there are books and YouTube videos.. but nothing beats having a real life person guide you... I’d love to know, how are you all finding this new path..? Are you staying home and doing nothing..? Are you becoming the new expert in everything - so you can teach your children and engage with their interests..? Or, are you braving it out there and coming to terms with some of this and finding a way to be ok with it all..?

It’s been too long.. so sorry my sweet friends. My girls and I ended up sorta extending-ish our deschooling journey... summer has been relaxing, stressful, easy, hard, educational, informative and so much more - and its only about 1/2 over!! We’ve had some personal ups and downs... starting with all our vacations being cancelled due to Covid, then I received some pretty terrible news about a friend, then I was in a car accident!
so yah, back to the beginning ... I started this summer with the need to do “school”. I felt the need to work all our brains. So I thought, let’s do this! I started off strong and determined... but it felt confusing and disjointed. Why, well. it was my first go round at working 1:1 with each kiddo... it felt nice to spend time with them individually, but it also meant our day took longer to get going- so that was a mental shift I wasn’t totally prepared for. 2ndly my girls have this AMAZING tutor, Miss M. She has been working with Big Love since lockdown (virtually). She now comes to the house, they sit outside she with a mask on- across from each other and both my girls work with her 2x a week independently. I have her b/c big love needs some real help. Her tool bag (as miss M. likes to say) was pretty empty ... she had zero tools that worked for her to help with math, spelling, and some additional reading skills... and Bear, well, Being only in K is a blank slate. She needs to learn what + or - sign is.. how to build on her already growing reading skills, and more...and frankly, she just wanted miss m. To work with her too - so I said yes! So yah... it was kinda confusing. My girls did 2x a week with miss m. Then 2x a week with me...it was just turning into a hot mess express 🥴. So I put my work on hold and decided to get these FUN-SCHOOLING journals. Miss M. And I felt the girls should do some writing to help keep up the spelling skills and the journals have been awesome for that! Funny thing, I had bought some before - totally didn’t get it and gave them away 🤦🏼‍♀️ - oh well, live and learn. This time around I joined the Facebook group and really got a better understanding — a BIG HELPFUL TIP- JOIN THE DANG GROUPS! Join all the freakin groups you can find if you are even remotely interested in a schooling method, book, resale, location, all of the above. I have found this sooooo helpful! And you know what - when I realize a style or group isn’t for me...I remove myself from it! No harm no fowl. So yah, I bought 2 journals 1 for each girl - they are language arts inspired, super low key, age appropriate (since they are open ended!) and get them thinking!

In addition to all this crazy personal stuff, my semi-failed attempt to “summer school” my kids 😬, my brain kept returning to the concept of unschooling. A dear friend who also in light of Covid has decided to homeschool and diving right into the methodology and schooling belief of unschooling- which is a homeschooling style/belief that is complete child-led learning. It involves teaching your kids through their interests, through life experience and exploration rather then with a curriculum. I have ALWAYS been drawn to this idea as a general concept. I struggle a bit with the idea of letting my kids take complete control - but I do believe that learning really does happen the most and most effectively when it is done organically and with sincere interest. There have been MANY studies that show how we retain information when we are interested in it rather then just reading it in a text book... this concept is not limited by age. You might be thinking, ell if they aren’t being exposed to it, then they won’t know they have an interest in it... yes and no. Learning can take place and can evolve from anywhere- think about it... your kids watch a show - say octonots - and learn about narwhals - that leads you to the library for books, YouTube for videos, artwork creating sea creatures, it turns into a love for ocean life, it becomes a trip to the aquarium, maybe a scheduled private tour in a boat to learn about something else, and so on... how freakin cool and soooo much more informative and in-depth then a paragraph in a book at a desk in school. This could go on and on.
so I guess where I’m going with all this is that - I’m still finding my way... my girls are really happy. I’m really happy with how they are learning right now. We are grateful we have miss m. She currently takes away my fears and worries about the math/spelling/reading - I love the simplicity of the fun-schooling... per my girls request we purchased a smoothie journal- which includes math and writing and recipes - which they love... and all the rest is just coming together through books and shows and art and conversation. Our kids are WAAAAAAYYYYY smarter then we give them credit for and they have so much to say - if we take a moment to listen. It’s kinda awesome.

Its’s been almost 2 months since we officially pulled our girls from public school. I went through a whirlwind of emotions, expectations, highs, lows, impulse purchases, returning those purchases and so much more. I came to the conclusion about 2 weeks in that what we were doing was NOT right for us and it was NOT working. I was falling into the trap of “making homeschool like regular school” and that was the opposite of what I wanted to do. So I did what felt right, even though I knew my husband kinda had reservations ...I decided we ALL needed to do what they call in the homeschooling universe as “deschooling” it’s really just a mindful break from intentionally schooling. Often families who withdraw their children from their previous schooling environment like to take time directly after and deschool... it is a time to decompress and for everyone to put the memories and methods learned and taught in school into a box and leave it there, enabling both the parents and children an opportunity to see and do things in a new way. This time is not meant to be spent watching tv 24/7 or not learning at all, but rather to just explore and learn in a very loose, non- concrete way. Maybe head out and go to a museum, or hike, do art projects and explore new mediums, read tons of books, cook together, free play - lots and lots of free play. Some folks say that deschooling is just as important for the parents as it is for the child... as they have been programmed to have certain expectations for their children, learning methodologies they are used to, working at a much faster pace then homeschooling needs to be or that their child might be interested in moving at. It gives you a chance to see what kind of interest and learning your kids are most attracted to, etc... the all knowing “they” of the homeschool world suggest that you take as much time as you need/want to deschool but a general rule of thumb is 1 month for each year your child was in school... so if you stopped after/during 2nd grade... approx 2 months or more when deschooling, etc.. as there is no right or wrong answer to this experience. So, how do you know when it’s time? Time to resume educating and formulating a curriculum or following a learning style... to be honest, I’m not 100% sure - we’ve been at it about 2 months now and IM kinda ready to go for it. I’ve picked out, ordered and I’m organizing our curriculum - I’m excited to try it out and offer a bit more structure... and I often feel my girls are there too... my little one especially. I can tell that at the end of a day where they have done much to stimulate her mind she is often off the walls and bouncing and doing flips, etc... more so then she usually does. She’s much like a dog 🤣 she not only needs physical exercise, but mental exercise too! I do wonder if it is silly to start school back up when summer is here and we will 9hopefully) be doing some travel or exploring... but maybe that won’t matter? Maybe it will be good to have Something to work on when we are home...This deschooling time has been important for us and I think it is a wonderful opportunity to connect as a family. I’m excited though to see how everything comes together now that we potentially nearing the end...

​If you find that your kids are stuck in the perfection rut maybe take a step back and find artists and art projects that showcase abstract art.  Artists like Jackson pollock, Andy Warhol,  Alexander Calder, Picasso, get onto a website like the MET and look at artwork together .... something else to think about,  get away from traditional forms of art like pen and paper or paint and have them study and practice photography, sculpture, or do collage work!   Get a piece of cardboard and some old magazine and tell them to look for things that inspire them and cut and paste.... these are all types of art that can unlock their brain to see things as less then perfect. Also, rather then doing something with a screen as your guide - set up in-person subject matter— still life objects, be their model, or get a photograph to work from and ask them rather then emulate the photo - maybe collage on top of it.  Art comes in all types of forms - not everyone is going to be good at or perfect at everything- that’s ok.  Encourage them to get messy - I have specific art clothes they put those on and they know they can get messy - we paint with our finger, our feet even! Take a step back from the traditional aspects of art altogether and start over. Be Free.

A Phrase I have seen brought up in many threads online, a comment I have had thrown at me almost every.single.time I mentioned I wanted, and now AM homeschooling. While yes, right now- NO ONE is socializing - except for the people living within our own four walls... I’m not worried about my kids and their socialization. Everyone always says you need schools for our kids to socialization - but really, they have very very little time to do that naturally. Unlike when we were growing up - and had an hour (or longer) for lunch and recess, so places even had recess 2x a day, the school my girls went to they only have a total of 35mins for lunch and recess combined.. during which they are not allowed to sit with who they like and can only play with kids in their own grade. Then, during the school day they do everything else with the children in their individual class and there is not guarantee that they will jive with anyone in class or that the overall vibe in the classroom will be cohesive. Both my girls experienced this at some point already, as did I much of elementary school.
I have seen, know of, and can't wait to be a part of a community where kids who are homeschooled (when not in quarantine) get out and play and do things with kids of all ages, often for many hours a day or numerous times a week.. depending on their schedule, family life etc... they also make and choose more meaningful friendships based on likes/activities/ family friendships... rather then just the xx number of kids in their grade.. many of whom they might never even get to know due to class selection or friend "cliques". To be honest, even though we live in a small town with many lovely families I never felt 100% comfortable with having my kids go on playdates at this young an age without me there or really getting to know the family they are hanging with, nor do I love having someone's child I don't know well and they don't know me at my home. What if they had an accident, or were being unkind to my other daughter, what if they were afraid of our dogs, or rude to my husband or I... without knowing the child or the parent, how can I comfortably react to the many situations that could arise while watching their child - but due to the social norms of our town I had to adjust very quickly if I wanted either of my girls to have a relationship beyond the school playground with any of the kids in her class.
I know my girls will be well socialized and happy and well adjusted and I can now do this with likeminded people, or choose to have my girls interact and foster friendships with other kids and families I feel a connection with, or spend more time with family friends and prioritize those. Bottom line, my kids, just like the vast majority of other kids who are homeschooled, they will be just fine.

However, I have learned something extremely valuable about my kids during this process... my kids are WAY more apt to learn something if it is not in a workbook.   Yes, some subjects MUST be done in workbook - there is no two ways about it.  I read not too long ago that when your kids are within the grades of k-3 subjects like math or even word study are the most impactful when taught hands on or as games... It really struck a cord with me and stuck with me.  I've now done "game days" for math and WOW, I see it coming together.  Great example, My little one has seen/heard us talk about place value with numbers and the other day I used a montessori approach to explaining it.  They both "got it" but I could tell by the end, rather then really  getting it - it had been lost on them both in some way and it ended with my older one feeling "not as smart as" her little sister (which is TOTALLY not true!) -  So today, I found this game on pinterest using UNO cards and improved upon it a bit to help my girls and decided it was math for today.  WOW what a difference.  If you're curious - here's what we played. 

Place value UNO war
Here's how to play. *You can play this with just the 1's place value, 10's, or go up to 100s or even 1000s!  

1. pull out all the non-number cards
2. take 8.5x11 paper and write out the place values for the game you want to play - dividing them on the paper - so your kids can see where to place their cards
3. shuffle and deal out all the cards 
4. when they put down their numbers - make sure they go in order, hundreds, tens, ones.. etc...  (we did 1 round of 10s and then a 2nd round of 100s)
5. Have them each say their own numbers - I did it with them if needed.   Saying,  8-hundreds, 5-tens, 3-ones... then told them how to say it "853" and asked them to try it too... they kinda just did it voluntarily.  If either of them got it incorrect, for example Big Love often is confused when a zero is in the 10s place - or Bear flip  flops numbers (Saying 13 for 31 for example)
6. I then asked them to tell me who won that round  - they yell it out.  I then took turns having them explain to me WHY that person one - often flipping around the other persons paper - so they could easily see the difference between  the 2 numbers. 

It was AMAZING to see by the end of the game how they were analyzing it all and seeing the differences between the winners hand and the losing hand... it was great when they would have the same number for the 1st place value but the 10s or even 1s would be their "downfall".  You could 100% take this to a higher level and ask them to subtract the difference between the two numbers to see who won by how many - and make those "points" for winning the game - rather then just who has a larger stack of cards.  
​

Im going to preface this with - Im no expect, I haven't done this for more then a hot minute... but I will say that while I can be spontaneous in many ways - it usually comes with a good 4-12mns of research behind it.  Im more of a person who gets an idea in their mind and BAM! It's happening.  So yah, while I might not be walking the walk in full capacity just yet I feel pretty good sharing what I have found  and why I'm interested in it. 

Homeschooling seems to come in all shapes and sizes, where you live often determines if you have to follow any sort of "rules" and so on.  In New Jersey, where we live - it is surprisingly very relaxed... you just need to write your school with a certified letter that you are withdrawing your kids and BAM! you're on your own... with that though means you get ZERO help from your state or town.  That's cool though.. Im good with that.   Other states have different rules and regulations so before you take this plunge, make sure you know what you're doing :) 

Before I did this - I joined a few facebook groups for my state, and also the part of the state Im in (northern nj),  along with joining groups that fit the "Style" homeschooler I felt I aligned with the most. There are a BUNCH of "styles" of homeschoolers out there.. Across my findings I stumbled across this blog and took the quiz they have - which helped to lead me along my path on understanding what is out there and having a better understanding as to the kind of schooler I would like to be.  
http://eclectic-homeschool.com/homeschool-philosophies-quiz/  

So yah, after taking this quiz I went out and googled the S**T out of these findings -- leading me to learn that I am a "relaxed" charlotte mason- literature based, montessori, unit studies inspired homeschooler 😂. God help me! 

But really and truly it did get me thinking - how do my kids learn and how do I plan to teach them... would and should I rely on workbooks and what did/does that look like... do I care if they did stuff on the computer and if so, how much of it would be online, do I want to join co-ops, or find places where my kids can take in person classes, and more. 

I will note that before these past few weeks I had planned wholeheartedly to have a relaxed, modified "unschooling" approach -  one filled with play based, adventures, meeting new people and making new friends, very little "workbook work"  almost like a year of deschooling (a term often used when you take time to "forget" about your public school time) However I realized that while I will 100% incorporate free play and adventures, and travel - lots of travel!  I do see the value of this year really figuring out how my children learn and focusing on being tight knit and together.  We as a family will spend time with each other, we will of course do things and get out there  and adventure, it's in my soul to do that but mainly to do a lot of connecting with ourselves... we will spend time with our existing friends and keep those relationships thriving, they will most likely have speech and tutoring, and my girls have expressed the desire to do certain activities and those will take time and dedication.   

While Im a big mover and shaker- this forced at home experience is reminding me that it is ok to take time to adjust in our own way... that we will have many years and months to make new friends and try new things.
​